Dark comedy stands up because humans are dark by nature. When we hit something we can’t quite deal with, we laugh it off. This is why coroners tell dead body jokes and paramedics sometimes make fun of their charges. Maybe the only thing we turn to as quickly in times of trouble is hot sex.
Sometimes that hot sex happens between two (or more!) people that shouldn’t be having hot sex.
That’s The Vicious Kind, straight-up. An underrated and under-viewed indie flick starring Brittany Snow and Adam Scott that’s just sexual tension and bad decisions from beginning to end. Scott plays a character who’s slowly losing his mind from sleep deprivation and grief over a failed relationship, who becomes transfixed with his little brother’s girlfriend. It’s a great flick, and I recommend it to anyone who likes the kind of humor that’s so dark it’s practically tar.
There is one issue though, and you need to be aware of it before you spend your precious time viewing this film.
There are no feet in this film.
Until today, I didn’t realize what an issue this might be, but thanks to the internet, now I do. Let me be clear – the characters have feet. The movie doesn’t revolve around a science-fiction species that goes around without feet. They just keep them in socks and boots and things because it’s winter and these people are cold.
This movie does have Adam Scott buttfucking a prostitute while taking selfies with an old school camera. It has a sex scene that’s so over the top hot that it’s on porn sites despite neither actors actually being naked. It has all of this – and more. Almost every bit of tension in the movie is erotic tension. There’s even a scene where Brittany Snow lays down on the floor and gets herself off while thinking of the dude she only recently punched in the face.
But, as I mentioned, no feet.
I guess there are more people in the world who take a near-pornographic scene of a famous actress with a grain of salt than I realized.
While it might seem ungrateful, it is worth acknowledging, as this YouTuber does, that over 80% of the American population are foot-fetishists who simply cannot abide vanilla, footless pornography in which feet are not venerated, in which creamed corn is not stepped in, in which a rotten pumpkin is not involved.
Not only are they a vast enough majority to merit their own warning, much like the oft-lauded “Do Not Use In Shower” sticker you find on your hair dryer, it is there for a reason. Need I remind you of the Great Ontario Foot Riot of ’98? Stockingate?
Out of respect for our readers and the vast sexual majority, I feel it would be wrong to leave you hanging. I know how much you need this.
