I don’t believe that the greatest music I’ve ever heard whatever I happened to listen to growing up. To me, that’s a huge red flag. And listen, I get it: the nostalgia pull for songs you’ve known for twenty-plus years is incredible, and not something I’m immune to. There will always be albums, musicians, bands, and songs that tug my heartstrings. You should’ve seen me when I finally saw Fall Out Boy at the ripe old age of 36 and they played my favorite song live for the first time in over 15 years. I nearly passed out, and I am not ashamed; 16-year-old Nicole came out in full screaming force.
However, I have some absolute favorites I’ve only discovered in the last few years. I’m a massive boygenius fan (hello, sad bisexuals!) and a lover of all three members’ individual careers, too. Orville Peck is incredible and I’ve been to two of his rodeos, and I first heard about him in 2019 thanks to RA (who accompanied me to said rodeos). Chappell Roan; Remi Wolf; Bad Bunny; Japanese Breakfast; Doechii. The list goes on and on and on because there is still so much good music being made now/in the last decade, and refusing to listen to it doesn’t make you cool, it makes you an old fart.
But that’s not really the point of today’s post. Normally, this is RA’s domain, but we both have pretty eclectic-yet-specific tastes, so I’m jumping in with today’s offering: Cowboy Hunters. Do you also need a band that’s nü metal meets punk with a dash of funk and also The White Stripes but with an absolutely incredible amount of profanity? You just might! I sure did. I discovered them a few weeks ago on Instagram. To say I’m a wee bit obsessed would be an understatement.
The members, Megan Pollock and Desmond Johnston, met in Scotland while studying at university and formed the band back in 2022, which is somehow four years ago. They’ve been putting out screaming punk metal mashup music ever since.
This is their newest release (today!!!) via popular demand from their recent Treacle Live Session that went up on YouTube a month ago, and I think it’s a great representation of the band on every level. And it is perfection: the style, the sound, the lyrics, all of it. I’m too old to get in the pit but goddamn would I be encouraging the pit to go harder and faster at this show.
“Gemma” is an excellent song to wish on your worst enemy: “Gemma / I hope you hate your job / and I hope they fucking keep you until your face, it rots / 9 to 5 ’til the night you die / Hope it’s 9 to 5 ’til the night you die.” DAMN. A takedown of capitalism that is also a hard read on the person you hate the most? Incredible work.
I was always told that as I aged, I would become more conservative and start loving bands I did not enjoy when I was younger, like U2 and James Taylor. Well, I’m now pushing 40, and I can categorically say I’ve never hated U2 and James Taylor more. I’m more likely to be blasting Rage Against the Machine and Cowboy Hunters in the car than anything else lately. I’ve got a whole bunch of tattoos and a nose ring. It’s almost like I’m a full-grown adult who has realized that everything is totally fucked, and instead of getting more conservative, I’m getting more angry and compassionate. What are the odds?
My only gripe with Cowboy Hunters is that my two favorite songs (the first and third in the above video of them Live From the Beach House) are currently unreleased except for live videos. The song titles in question? “People That Fuck” and “Free Pussy.” The moment these are available outside of YouTube, they will be in constant rotation in my house and life. I’m already walking around the house murmuring, “How did you get three pussies, bitch?”
How did you get three pussies, bitch?
Most of the comments I’ve seen on their videos have been something like, “My body has been ready for this for long before it came into existence,” but there are the occasional ones of, “I heard five seconds and my ears flew off and into the bin.” Maybe your ears are better off there, sir, and you should shove the rest of your body in along with them because all of you is TRASH.
Um, I mean, people are entitled to their own opinions and maybe this isn’t your cup of tea! That’s fine; more for me.
By now you’ve probably realized that most of their songs are around two minutes long, and yes, they both play bass and drums. The two of them alternating on bass and drums is probably the coolest/hottest thing I’ve ever seen. The moment I hear they are heading Stateside (which might not be for several years thanks to the hellhole we’re currently living in) I’m first in line for the tour. Or we can make Dirge a big success and I’ll fly over and interview them. Let’s make that happen! Anyway, I hope you have enjoyed this little foray into Cowboy Hunters, so go and enjoy them on your own time. Or don’t!
